So with everything going on in the world right now, I haven’t felt it was my place to speak up, being a middle-aged white woman and all. I don’t feel like my voice is one that needs to be heard right now, mostly because I am still trying to learn (and un-learn) all of the stereotypes, prejudices, tropes and other mis-guided notions that have been a part of America’s history and present. But since I started this blog to get my ideas down on paper and I’ve been sitting on some pretty big feelings for the last few weeks, I’ve decided to spew them here. Where I’m pretty sure no one is watching. Or reading. And I’m ok with that.
I have started reading so many different books and articles and watching movies and listening to podcasts and trying to discover what my own biases are based on my childhood and the world I grew up in. My biases about being a racist or an antiracist. And let me be clear, I am striving to be an antiracist. I see so many people on FaceBook (friends, family, people I genuinely like, or at least thought I did) spewing vitriol and misinformation like it’s their fucking job. I have family members who literally say to my face “you know I love you” and then turn around and write some of the most horrific shit on FaceBook and all I can think is…”well obviously you don’t.”
I don’t understand the resistance to information and education. It’s one thing to be a conservative or a liberal but to blatantly refuse to look at facts or twist information in order to support your own agenda and then to do it under the guise of GOD is so hypocritical to me I can’t even. I am over here trying to find my way to a spirituality and a God that makes sense to me and all I see is things like “Trans people are faking it” or “white privilege is a joke” or #alllivesmatter and then blatantly disregarding those babies (black, white, brown) if they are born to a poor or drug addicted mother who can’t take care of her child and turning around and saying it’s all on the mother to figure her shit out.
Wake up America!
I guess what I really don’t understand is how I amassed this amount of people in my life who are so far away from what I think and believe and my value system. I’m sure there are a lot of people out there thinking that right now. How did we become so divided? I used to say all the time that I loved having conservative friends because it gave us something to talk about. Like something real to talk about. It made life interesting. I don’t want a bunch of friends exactly like me, ugh, I can hardly stand me. But I honestly don’t think I want to be related to, or friends with, a majority of the people on my FB “friends” list. Maybe it’s social media. It’s given a platform to any and all and without respectful face-to-face discussion these major issues can rarely be figured out behind a computer screen. Maybe it’s the disrespectful and abhorrent President we’ve elected.
When I see inflammatory rhetoric being thrown around haphazardly, it makes me cringe. Like calling what has mostly been peaceful protests “riots” or calling those who are pro-choice “pro-abortionists,” that shit really fires me up. Words are powerful. They carry heat and can turn situations around in a heartbeat. When a person uses inflammatory speech to make a point it’s not being used to bring people together, it is being used to divide and conquer. And that’s all I see happening right now. Dividing and conquering of this nation and its good people. All the people. To paraphrase Ibram X. Kindi: There are bad individuals in every group, but there isn’t now, nor has there ever been a bad group of people. And to me, if you think otherwise, we probably won’t be friends. Ever.